Marriage

Well I don't know where to start - my life just seems to be like a giant wave - tossed and turned everywhere! I'm not complaining - just needing to vent and put down my thoughts about all of this -
I came home earlier yesterday from work since I wasn't feeling that great (cramping, etc.) and ended up having a fight with Fred - yes we do fight - what relationship doesn't (and if someone honestly thinks that the perfect relationship is a fight free one you are sorely mistaken! it happens admit it!). Anyways so it wasn't good and I decided I needed to get out of the house - I drove to Sarnia and got some lunch and then sat and thought - the biggest reason for the fight is due to our pride and tempers - lately my emotions have been everywhere! again a wave best describes it. so after a lot of thought about what had happened I went to the Christian Book Store just to look - and I found this great bible study on balancing and understanding my emotions

- it looks at scripture and the author bases her thoughts from those (which is what I think is important - not listening to someone else and their opinions but scripture and what we can learn from it - thats why God gave us the bible).
So anyways I have done one study and I'm really enjoying it - started another one today too. I love the verses they have put together! The only thing missing in it is the group dynamic - talking about what you learn with other females. But I guess for now this will due - at least i'm doing something.
When I got home Fred and I had a talk - which is good - both said we were sorry and talked about why it happened. I know that I have not been "well" lately and need to get back with God so that everything else will fall into place.
Marriage is hard work - and I hope before going into everyone knows that - its not all romance and fairy tales stuff! Its not about the ring or the cute house - its about two people coming together - which bringing two people together and making one life should be work - I often find myself "losing myself" in our marriage - becoming the "yes" wife - not because of Fred - but because it seems easier at the time. I know I'm probably confusing someone out there with my ramblings - but I want women to know that marriage can be wonderful and its important to put time and energy into because if you don't it won't suceed - but marriage also doesn't mean giving up oneself. Yes there is some give in take in a marriage like any other relationship - but don't change completely and do all the giving because you will come to resent "him" for that change even though he never expected you to.
Okay enough of that - wow!
Anyways exciting news - Kingston called and asked for Fred's references and all is looking good - probably won't hear from them until the end of June about their final decision but all is going smoothly - but you never know.
Currently doing the laundry and some cleaning today - and hope that later on I can do some scrapping - I really really really need to get on to Grandma's book!
And then later on this afternoon Fred wants to go to Stratford to a Teen Challenge auction to look at cars - so won't be home this evening for awhile.
Okay so here are some scripture verses I want to highlight from the study:
Job 15:12
"Why do you let your emotions take over; lashing out and spitting fire?"

Psalm 119:161 b
"...but my heart trembles at your word."

Hebrews 4:12
"For the word of God is living, and active, and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing even to the dividing of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and quick to discern the thoughts and intents of the heart."

Proverbs 3:5
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding."